Diary
by psuliem
Summary: old story, uploaded by request. onesided jay/zane


_old story wont be edited_

Jay/Zane

* * *

Dear Diary,

He isn't a normal guy. You know this. I talk about him enough. Well, a little more than I should.

Anyway.

He isn't normal. Everyone else knows this, too. They really don't care. They treat him like a normal guy.

I don't. I treat him like what he is.

A robot.

I mean, I don't treat him badly! No, no. Of course not.

I just see all the girls all over him treating him like a piece of meat and I figure it must be nice to be treated like what you are. So I do.

Is that a bad thing? Should I ask him?

I totally should. Oh, shit. What if I hurt his feelings? Ha. Damn, I actually laughed just now.

He doesn't have feelings.

* * *

Dear diary,

Today, I found out he has feelings. It was really upsetting actually. He'd shoved me up against the wall when I had made a crude joke under my breath. He told me to stop with all of my joke and rude comments.

I don't make that many rude comments. I don't know what he's talking about... Well, I recall a few.

Not a lot, though.

Alright, fine. I call him a lot of rude things. I don't know why. I just do.

Maybe I'll figure out why at some point, but for now it just is.

I blushed when he'd pushed me against the wall, though.

* * *

Dear Diary,

I told Zane I loved his cooking and he thanked me. I always tell him this.

I was sitting in the kitchen with him this time and just hopped up on the counter and sat there near him.

He kept glancing up at me, seeming confused for awhile.

"...Jay?" He'd said to me, in that sweetfull voice of his. "What are you doing?"

I didn't know how to respond, because, honestly Diary, I have no clue what I was doing staring at him like that while he cooked.

All I know is that he looked really good doing it.

I need to stop writing this stuff in pen.

* * *

Dear Diary,

I went out with Nya today, but I couldn't stop thinking about ZANE.

Fucking Zane!

What the hell did I do to deserve this?

Nothing. That's what.

* * *

Dear Diary,

Zane is fucking crazy.

I tried to talk with him today and he fucking kissed me to shut me up.

Too bad I enjoyed it.

* * *

Dear Diary,

This is the 20th day in a row I've written about Zane in this fucking book. What the hell is wrong with me?

Anyway.

He was acting weird around me.

I thought he'd just wanted me to stop talking a few days ago, but he seems nervous around me.

I don't think I kissed back, but if I did then that's probably why he's freaking out.

I wasn't supposed to kiss back, was I?

* * *

Dear Diary,

I wasn't supposed to kiss back.

* * *

Dear Diary,

Cole told me I was a dumbshit today and I still have no clue why. I didn't make Zane breakdown.

He's probably just being an asshole. Like always..

Other than that, I've been trying to fix Zane. I found his blueprints and they are a little hard to read, but I can probably have him fixed in a few days.

* * *

Dear Diary,

I fixed Zane. He woke up gasping. Like he'd been dead. He just stared at me for awhile before shutting the cover on his vest quickly like it wasn't supposed to be open. I mean, it wasn't, but he acted like I was dirty.

He still thanked me, though. Kind of reluctantly.

I guess all of that was kind of personal. I just pretty much saw the inside of my good friend while he was "dead".

* * *

Dear Diary,

Today Zane made my favorite meal as a thank you. He couldn't look me in the eyes, but the gesture was nice.

* * *

Dear Jay,

This is Zane. Please come talk to me when you get the chance? I'm sorry for invading your privacy. You invaded mine, so we are even, now.

* * *

DEAR DIARY,

HOW COULD YOU LET ZANE READ ALL OF THIS. COLE EVEN SAID IT WAS GAY I WRITE IN A DIARY.

Well you are inanimate. Whatever, though.

Fuck you, diary.

* * *

...Dear Diary,

Sorry about that yesterday. I was just freaking out.

I talked with Zane and he told me how I invaded his privacy.

How the hell else was I supposed to fix him?

But he said that he didn't like me that way.

I feel stupid and childish crying in the bathroom right now.

What did I except?! I'm even dating Nya.

I need to stop being such a dumbshit.

Oh. Now I get why Cole said that.

* * *

Dear Diary,

It's been awhile. A few weeks, actually.

I've been busy getting on with my life and kick snake tail. (Haha! Get the pun?!) I'm almost over Zane, though.

It was hard at first, but after awhile I started to manage better and paid more attention to Nya. I still love her like nobodies business.

* * *

Dear Diary,

Last page. So I'll make this quick.

I saw Zane and Cole hugging today and I don't know why, but I was heartbroken?


End file.
